Thursday, 13 August 2009

Why Do We Discriminate Against the Re-Marrying Divorced?


Why do we discriminate against the divorced when they wish to remarry? In this diocese divorced people wishing to be remarried in the church must fulfill a specific set of criteria. One relates to the divorced person fulfilling all responsibilities, and working through any outstanding issues, from the previous marriage. The other requirements are that the couple connect themselves to an Anglican faith community, and must be referred to Anglicare for counselling. The Archbishop must give his approval before the priest in question can participate in the wedding. The stated reason why these criteria are mandatory is because of the higher rate of breakdown in second and subsequent marriages. (I wouldn't mind seeing the latest statistics, but seemed unable to dig them up on the internet.)

The problem is that we make it compulsory and we do not do so for first marriages. The rate of breakdown of first marriages is alarming in itself, and if we add into it the breakdown of live-in relationships prior to first marriages I wonder if there is any real distinction to be made. For consistency we should make similar criteria for first marriages, or else make the criteria suggestions for the clergy to consider when doing their pastoral work.

So why discriminate? I suspect it has something to do with a lingering, visceral discomfort about the remarriage of divorced persons.

3 comments:

Stephen James Bloor said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Stephen James Bloor said...

Hi warren, I would be interested in seeing the current statistics. However, the ones I saw two years ago, was that in first marriages only 10% fail. In second and subsequence marriages of divorced people the rate jumps to something like 66% of the marriages failing. Now, that might have changed, however, I highly doubt it.

I personally agree though that we shouldn't discriminate against divorced people that we probably should require exactly the same things of first marriages that we do for second and following.

(Edited for clarity)

Warren Huffa said...

I could find some general data from ABS, but not comparing divorce rates for first and subsequent marriages. however, an article from SMH quotes Relationships Australia as saying one third of first marriages end in divorce, and it doubles for subsequent marriages. Here is the article: http://www.smh.com.au/text/articles/2009/08/01/1248977234500.html